Friday, June 15, 2007

non-heteronormative sims 2 on my mobile phone



first, okay, i used the word "heteronormative" - sue me.

i know it's 2:00 in the morning, but i had to blog this, because it was totally unexpected and pretty exciting, (1) because i'm a dork and (2) it shows that someone actually thought about... well, just read on.

i downloaded "the sims 2" onto my sprint pcs phone, so i could have something else to do on the way home from work in the event that i accidentally leave my iPod playing all day and then the battery dies. oops. so, as i'm choosing my character, i scroll though all the female characters and choose one named "poppy" (and not to give any spoilers, but the name is phonetically indistinguishable from the name of a certain character on the l word).

anyway, so poppy sleeps, watches tv, cooks, uses the toilet, takes showers... and then she meets a couple of people who show up at her door: ben and penny.

of course, i'm thinking, "okay, so i'm supposed to hang out with penny and flirt with ben." this is, after all, the crappy mobile version of the sims. i'm rachel. ben is ross. and penny is monica, who is my best friend. duh.

so i socialize with them both. ben is generally receptive to talking and a little bit of friendliness. penny is receptive to talking, gossiping and friendliness as well. then some other options appeared with ben: romantic and relationship. ben is lukewarm to the romantic options. but i had already reached 100/100, so i decided to send both penny and him home. tomorrow i shall try with ben again!

the next day (note: each day is like ten minutes on sims time) when my socialization points are low i invite penny over and we chat until i got around 75/100 points, and then, strangely, the screen turned pink and the prompt notifies me that "your sims is in love."

EXCUSE ME?! whaddafock?

when i reached 100/100 points with ben i wasn't informed that i was in love. what is going on?!

then i noticed that "romantic" and "relationship" were also options with penny.

someone clearly intended to program same sex attraction into the mobile version of sims 2. funny, though, that it occurred on my first attempt to play the sims.

excellent!

then i send penny home. (it is tuesday, sims time.)

then on wednesday penny comes over unannounced.

so i choose the "sleep over" options. she accepts!

so, on thursday sims time i choose the option "move in." she accepts!

and then on friday i choose the "propose" option. she accepts! (a wedding ring icon appears on the screen afterwards.)

so poppy meets penny on monday. penny sleeps over on wednesday and moves in with poppy on thursday, and they get married on friday.

THIS IS SO SCARILY ON POINT THAT THE MOBILE VERSION MUST HAVE BEEN PROGRAMMED BY A LESBIAN. i'm too afraid to play the rest of the game.

predictions:

on saturday, poppy's ex brandi comes over unannounced and causes a stink. despite the fact that brandi arrived unannounced and it isn't poppy's fault, penny storms out of the house and refuses to answer her cell phone. brandi plants herself in front of the television set and announces that she is staging a sit in.

later that day, brandi's curent girlfriend appears at the door and demands to be let in. poppy refuses, and brandi interjects, "shiat! why you gotta be like that!" and stomps out of the apartment, stealing a beer as she leaves.

penny comes back that night, sullen and uncommunicative. poppy's screen keeps reminding her that her socialization points are low, yet penny refuses to engage. poppy then calls ben for moral support and ben obliges.

yet another day in SIMSland. :)

3 comments:

Denise said...

OMG. I also used the word heteronormative - in an email to someone who commented on my homeschool blog http://fasttimes.clubmom.com . As soon as I did it, I felt like the world was going to explode. I hate that word! ;-)

I love that you did the whole uhaul after the first date thing. Love it. It's making me want to play the game just so I can be a stereotypical lesbian!

emily2 said...

i know. earlier, i totally ragged on people who used that word, but i couldn't think of a more appropriate one at the time. so there it be.

The Pedant said...

I steal people's significant others all the time in the Sims 2. It's the way to go.