I've had it with these mother f***ing raccoons on this mother f***ing yard!

you just can't make this shit up: psycho killer raccoons terrorize olympia. yes, that is the actual title of the article.

Some have taken to carrying pepper spray to ward off the masked marauders and the woman who was bitten now carries an iron pipe when she goes outside at night.

"It's a new breed," said Tamara Keeton, who with Kari Hall started a raccoon watch after an emotional neighborhood meeting drew 40 people. "They're urban raccoons, and they're not afraid."

"urban" raccoons? kind of like the furry version of the crips or the latin kings?

In one case five raccoons tried to carry off a small dog, which managed to survive.

...

Brown said he had seen packs of raccoons this big but none so into killing.

"They are in command up there," he said.

there is something very "monty python" about all of this. i can't put my finger on it.