blogger stinks.

Blogger has been down all day. Here is everything I tried to post earlier today.

1. NEW JERSEY STINKS

this headline says it all: "New Jersey eyed as source of stench"

• New: New Jersey eyed as source of gas-like stench
• New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg calls the odor "unpleasant" but harmless

as a proud resident of new jersey, i will concede that parts of new jersey smell like ass. every time i return to north jersey after visiting my fiancee's family in south jersey, i know i am close to home when i pass the gargantuan chemical plants near elizabeth, nj and the obscene odors that they emit. no, that stink isn't ikea! i know i am almost home when i smell the rankness. when the foul stench hits my nose, i get a warm and fuzzy feeling, because i know that i will get to sleep in my own bed. "yay! i want to puke. i'm almost home!"

however, the smell doesn't really travel. the cloud of ass gas generally stays put and doesn't affect surrounding areas. i never smell anything bad in hoboken. but according to the bush administration, we could all die if a terrorist were to blow up the plants, and a chemical cloud were to spread like wind. (well, if new york's theory is true, a chemical cloud DID spread by wind, and well... nothing happened.)

and new jersey hits back - from nj.com:

Did Jersey swamp stink gas New York? It's sad but true: Experts blame us for the gassy smell that hung over over NYC and Jersey City Monday.

Later in the story: [New Jersey Environmental Protection Commissioner Lisa Jackson] also bristled upon hearing that New York officials said they believed the smell came from New Jersey. "It looks an awful lot like jumping to conclusions," she said.

well, who knows. maybe babies will be born with three eyes in new york. thank us later! *kiss kiss*

2. IPHONE ALSO STINKS
it's coming! but it will only be available on cingular, the stinkiest wireless service in existence. DROPPED CALLS, anyone? LOST VOICEMAILS, anyone? SERVICE OUTAGES, anyone? forget it. i'll stick with sprint.