Monday, August 27, 2007


"Hey, WTF did I ever do to you?! Uh, can I has Milk Bone?"

"Unfortunately, legions of today's youths are being sold the lie that fighting dogs is a way to prove their bravery and machismo."

All right. How is standing behind the safety of a gate while an animal fights in your place a sign of "bravery"? So, if your little doggy chews off the face of someone else's little doggy, that makes you an alpha male? If you want to be a macho man, put your own ass on the line. Sign up for Ultimate Fighting, and leave Fido out of it.

I have an idea. Let's make it a rule that if your dog gets bitten in the leg, you have to stab yourself in the leg. If your dog's eyes get gouged out, you have to gouge out your own eye with a pencil. If your dog's face gets mauled, you have to stick your head in a meat grinder. If your dog dies, you have to jump off a twenty story building into a wrought iron gate with spike railheads.

If these rules were implemented and had to be followed, dog fighting would end.


The Pedant said...

I prefer the Bob Hoskins in Unleashed concept of getting a man-child Jet Li to do all your fighting for you.

emily2 said...

Or sheesh. Can't you just play Mortal Kombat?